Marinated Pen Ruminations

My pen obsession has subsided.
As quick as it has taken hold on my person, it has quelled just the same.

And this sudden event has got me thinking--why the instant fetish for fountain pens?

and i think i know what it is. it's like the Oedipus complex with pens.
i know it's f*cked up but i cannot see any other compelling reason--
to explain the irrational desire of wanting those super expensive-ass montblancs, viscontis and Pelikans in the first place.

yep.
fairly simple really:

Pen as Phallic symbol + expensive fountain pen as symbol for affluence

is equal to

Dad's struggle because he never finished school + His son (who finished school) resenting it and all the baggages it entails

does it make sense to you?

you see, i'd come up with the conclusion that owning that shiny pen with a black resin barrel and a 21K gold nib (now that i have a higher paying job [which makes me kinda "kinda" afford it]) is the ultimate act of ME proving to MYSELF that "I AM NOT MY FATHER"

(*and i feel really guilty of this "resentment" because the fact is, my father ain't so badn (hence the repression). he's just trying to make things work, the best way he could, and--i am very proud that he has carved a place for himself in the industry, my father's life is a great underdog story really. )

which is a delusion in a way, cause yes in more ways than we think we are like our parents, we just shove it at the back of our minds. (and you know how suppression does to you [its creepy]).

so realizing that...
the spell of the Fountain Pen is broken.
and i could just see it as it is: a nice (albeit expensive) writing instrument.
that more probably than not, i wont get to use much since, im too afraid i'll drop it nib first--since im very clumsy.

*
but is doesn't mean that i dont want fountain pens anymore (just saw Obama using a Le Grand to edit his speeches and felt envious) i have just tamed my passions for them.
so, i still am looking forward to buy the "reasonably" priced once like the "Pelikan Tradition M215" and the "Lamy 2000".

but in the meantime my humble Parker vector works just fine.